the affair - part two (my body's reaction)

It's been just 6 days since Tom admitted to his hookup with the skanky alcoholic whore, and I've been on quite a roller coaster ride both physically and emotionally since then. I'm steering clear of dealing with the emotional part for now. I want some time to process, analyze and think before I react. Maybe that's not the best way to go about it, but for now it's the best I can do and I'm making decisions that I feel are best for me. I have an appointment with a counselor on Wednesday and am looking forward to getting some professional help in dealing with this life changing situation.

On Thursday I experienced both the good and the bad of the physical spectrum. I felt great. I think I was doing a good job of dealing with the extreme stress I'm under, I felt quite healthy after a good hard hike a couple days earlier and I was relaxed and rejuvenated after an awesome massage.

Thursday evening as I was making myself something to eat my stomach started cramping and within a few minutes I was at the beginning of a long, horrible bout of a hard hitting stomach virus. It was bad (I'll spare you the graphic details). Friday morning after things settled down a little I drove myself to urgent care and was given medication to calm things down and was given IV fluids for dehydration. A couple of medications for nausea and the gastric upset kept me on the couch, asleep for the rest of Friday and Saturday. Sunday was a bit better and I ventured out of the house for a few hours, and today, Monday, I'm still feeling sick. I have an appointment this afternoon with my primary care doctor. Hopefully it's nothing serious. I'm convinced it's not a coincidence that this happened and believe it's my body's reaction to what's going on.

It's a little disheartening to realize that I'm clearly not handling things well if my body is screaming and acting out is such a violent manner. Perhaps it's time to rethink my approach and maybe start dealing with my feelings and emotions.

I remain optimistic. I have a wonderful support system of family and friends and I am so grateful for each and every one of them. I feel supported, protected and loved. I am thankful for my current circumstances because I know in my heart and soul, this is taking me down a road that will lead to the bigger and better things that life has in store for me.

I continue to honor the 7 Directions. :)